NYSAE’s Executive Women in Nonprofits

By Nicole Millman-Falk, CAE

"Letting go of needing to know how everything is going to turn out before you even get in the game is not going to work any more," says Gail Blanke, founder, president, and CEO of Lifedesigns, a company whos vision is to empower men and women to live truly exceptional lives. Blanke was the featured speaker at NYSAE’s Women in Nonprofits SIG, which met November 8. The program was hosted by the International Council of Shopping Centers.

Blanke’s advocates letting go as a way to achieve success. In her book Throw Out Fifty Things: Clear the Clutter, Find Your Life, she maintains: "If the belief or conviction, the memory, the job, even the person—weighs you down, clogs you up, or just plain makes you feel bad about yourself, throw it out, give it away, sell it, let it go, move on."

She suggested SIG members let go of what already is in favor of what could be—both in our personal and professional lives and embrace the new spirit of entrepreneurism that is sweeping the country. This calls for leaders—particularly women—to be more flexible, to be willing to live with ambiguity, to accept failure.

While accepting failure as a way to grow may be difficult for senior executives, it is where most successful companies have begun, says Blanke, noting that Thomas Edison said: "I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that have not worked." She pointed out that Diana Nyad’s successful swim from Cuba to Florida without a protective cage was accomplished at age 64—on her fifth try in 35 years. Blanke’s mantra: Ask yourself what you failed at this week?

Blanke also suggested women executives learn to live in the grey areas. "We need to abandon perfectionism for growth; ambiguity is what the journey is all about."

She offered several suggestions for accepting the grey areas:

• Let go. Chisel your way out of the marble, out of the negative what ifs (what if I feel; what if the something new isn’t as good as the something old; what if where I move is not as good as where I am now).
• Observe creative people who make it up as they go along—jazz musicians; stand up comics, masters of improvisation.
• Trust yourself, your hunches, your passion for the possibilities of what might happen, and trust others who will help you.
• Practice making it up as you go along. Cook without a recipe; take dancing lessons; meet new people; take a class in improvisation.
• Just act.

"Think the unthinkable to achieve the marvelous." The next meeting of the Executive Women in Nonprofits SIG is Friday, January 10, at 8:30 a.m. Attendance is limited. Contact Holly Chair, NYSAE Executive Women in Nonprofits SIG, vice president Kellen Company, 355 Lexington Avenue, New York, NY 10017; (212) 297-2123; hkoenig@kellencompany.com.

Nicole Millman-Falk, CAE, is president of Millman-Falk Communications, LLC, and managing editor for NYSAE’s InView. She is also chair of the Awards Committee. She can be reached at 201-652-1687; mfc32@optonline.net; or millmanfalk@nysaenet.org.